India Rant and Raves

Last 8 days in India

2007-11-01T10:18:00.000-07:00

Time flies........... 8 more days to go before I leave India for good !

Been busy doing what I missed, I mean, checking out places which I wanted to go but never did really get down to doing it. eating joints, shopping places, etc. Just came back from dinner in fact from this place which was like open for 65 years, err, ok, 10 years in it's current location, and I like have seen it many many times but never really stepped in to have a meal there. Ok, not bad, the food.

Erm, should I visit the Golden Temple again ? Considering that I have done it like 12 times and now I would know more about Sikhism than my original religion Buddhism, well, maybe not.... but then again, maybe it's the last time in my life to visit the golden temple. Oh well....

I think this has just got into me......

2007-10-06T00:38:00.000-07:00

Just the day after someone horned from behind me for stopping at a red light, today I did the same (subsciously).... shucks !

I mean.... when you see a red light at the traffic junction, you are supposed to stop right ?

I mean, all my life I was taught, RED is stop, GREEN is go.... or was it something like that ?

So yesterday this bugger was behind me, I was slowing down to stop at the junction showing RED. When I stopped faithfully, he (most likely not a she) horned, apparently telling me to go.

Jialat, my subconsious has been programmed, I realised today......

Next Wed, a different life.....

2007-10-03T03:02:00.000-07:00

So, the bomb is finally dropped, the end of this gtindiarnr.blogspot.com as I will no longer be in India.

Just received news that I will be required to be in my new station from next Tue till Wed the week after so that I can familiarise myself of the new environment. Then back to Amritsar again, and then finally on 09 Nov I will be in my new place, fully settled.

Well, look forward to it......

Gari Cho

2007-09-30T20:49:00.000-07:00

7am I was sleeping soundly and my door bell began ringing furiously.... like you know, someone continuously pressing the buzzer frantically.

I thought it was an emergency or something, having just been jolted from my sleep and unable to think clearly.

Rush to open the door. Out side was this young indian boy whom I recognised as one of the bell boys from the hotel. He says to me "Gari Cho". I said "what?" He said "G a a r i C h o", I said "No I don't understand Hindi, can you say in English. You mean Car something ?" I knew Gari was something like Car.

"Yes, yes, car..... cho" the boy replied.

In my mind I was thinking, bloody what is this "cho"? Someone walking up my at 7am with a frantic buzz on my door and mentioning my car probably is something worth my attention. I thought maybe my car had caught fire downstairs !

"gari", and he makes a circular motion w his hand. "cleaned?" i asked.

"han ji han ji, gari cleaned".........

"KNNBCCB, wake me up at 7am to tell me my car is cleaned ? Nothing better to do is it ?"

Of course I did not manage to release my dictionary of hokkien bullets on him, anyway what difference would it make ? He won't even understand, much more he won't even understand that waking someone up at this wee hour for a piece of useless information is not appropriate.

My God........

Subway opens in Amritsar

2007-09-26T03:01:00.000-07:00

at last.... a long term solution to my quest for non-indian food ! To God be the Glory !

As you all know, Amritsar, being a small place tucked away in North India, suffers from exposure to the world, I mean, non exposure to the world. Thus, our simple pleasures like KFC, MacDonalds, Coffee Bean are not here. At last with the coming of Subway, to add to the Dominos and Pizza Hut, we finally see this secluded town coming up.

My trip to Subway to buy take away lunch was not without adventure though. As I was walking out of the front glass door, this security guard opens it for me. I was thinking "wah, not bad siah!". Later this guys blabbers something in Hindi to me. I say "huh, I don't speak Hindi (in Hindi), English please". He says in simplistic English "I open door for you, only 5 rupees"

....................

India wins by 5 runs, become World Cricket Champions !

2007-09-25T05:41:00.000-07:00

Phew, I must say the match yesterday was really really exciting !

Down to the last throw where Pakistan was left w a 6 to win and India was left to knock out one more wicket from Pakistan to win the game. I guess the players must have pee-ed in their pants.

The thrower threw, the batter batted, the ball flew up in the air, into the hands of the Indians.

Congrats once again

From : a fresh cricket fan.

I will never be able to understand the traffic here.

2007-09-25T05:28:00.000-07:00

They say if you can drive in India, you can drive anywhere, I've heard that countless times.

True, and false.

For a start, I can never understand the way the bikes zip around the cars. I mean, imagine you are driving along, and a bike just happens to be like 0.5m from your left front headlight. Crusing along happily....... and suddenly, this bike swerves right into your path to make a right turn.

So, who loses more when I knock into him/her/it ?

I mean, shouldn't the person who is riding the bike be more conscious of whether he/she/it will be hit in this case, rather than pass the responsiblity to the poor driver ?

Then............ people, old folks walking at 2kmph, children running at 10kmph, traffic from all directions, make up the bloody mess at every, and I mean every roundabout and junction. The adage "give way to the right" doesn't seem to apply here.

So, my point of view would be more of "if you have driven in India, you won't be able to drive anywhere else !"

India plays Pakistan in Finals of Cricket today

2007-09-24T06:01:00.000-07:00

Umm, never expected that I would become a cricket fan.

Well, I must say 50 overs is a tad too long, but this world twenty twenty that's going on in Durban is pretty interesting and just the right length - 20 overs instead of the 50, which lasts just too long..... beyond my dozen beers. :o)

Yuraj (India's star batter) is just got out.... at 15 overs now for India, the score is 111-3. We'll see how the final score goes later.

Happy Independence Day Hindustan

2007-08-14T23:42:00.000-07:00

In case you don't know, "Hindustan" is the old name for India. And yes, 15Aug, that is today, is the day when this nation celebrates Independence Day. Parades would be going on in the City of Bombay, but at Amritsar it's not such a big hoo haa. Err, but then again, I don't know, I have not gone out of my apartment yet.

60 years, that's how long India has been independent. On this day in 1947, India gained independence from British rule, at the same time losing it's muslim majority areas to become what is now Pakistan.

I guess the border festivities must be way cool today........

My first national day out of the nation

2007-08-08T21:18:00.000-07:00

ok.... if I remember correctly, this is probably my first national day out of Singapore... surprising.... with all the travelling, out station and all, just didn't manage to make it back this year for the occasion.

What's the big occasion some might ask ? Actually I do feel some pride for national day and Singapore. Much as I'm sometimes disatisfied with some Singapore policies etc, nonetheless, I fully admire my own sovereign country and the it's achievements.

I remember last year when I was discussing with my colleague to go back for National Day, her first reaction was "wah, so patriotic ah!". Ha ha.

Anyway, I won't miss the National Day Parade, on TV that is. good thing there's MOBTV now.Now to start my national day with my piping hot Char Kway Teow....

New FM Station set up in Amritsar

2007-08-05T22:53:00.000-07:00

Heard from my driver Eric yesterday that a new radio tower was set up in Amritsar recently. Mind you, when I mean "new" radio tower, I mean........ new. There are no radio towers in Amritsar prior to this.

But...........no value to me lei, all Hindi stations, damn it...... sianz......

I think iTunes, podcasts and Mobtv still serve me well........ :o)

New 7 Wonders named

2007-07-09T12:12:00.000-07:00

At last after the long votting process.....

The final tally produced this list of the world's top human-built wonders:
• The Great Wall of China
• Petra in Jordan
• Brazil's statue of Christ the Redeemer
• Peru's Machu Picchu
• Mexico's Chichen Itza pyramid
• The Colosseum in Rome
• India's Taj Mahal

Phew.... Taj Mahal is still one of the 7 wonders......

Strikes End

2007-06-14T07:05:00.000-07:00

ok, suah diou liao (or as the hokkiens say "disperse" after a big hoo ha)

12000 Indian Airlines Staff go on strike

2007-06-13T03:19:00.000-07:00

Yesterday night around 10pm, Indian Airlines staff started their flash strike nationwide, protesting against disparity with their Air India colleages (Indian Airlines and Air India are in the process of merging / merged).

Interesting, but non unexpected.

On one hand, you see the power of the lower level workers in bringing everything to a standstill, on the other it is disgusting to see it happen.

Got used to it anyway.

India Heat Wave

2007-06-10T03:08:00.000-07:00

The pinnacle of the Indian Summer is here, yesterday record temperatures of 47.8 degrees C in Amritsar. According to Channelnewsasia, 18 people died yesterday (2 in Punjab) in Northern India due to the heat wave.

Just went out to buy some mangoes, wah lau eh..... when you step out of the hotel, seriously, the heat wave just hits you. No joke. It's like a sauna outside !

Now my DVD player is working !

2007-05-31T00:29:00.000-07:00

I have DVDs from various parts of the world, and it was really sian when i could not play my favourite "Earth from Above" or "Coldplay concert" which I bought from Australia. (obviously different region code and stuff). This DVD player in my room in Amritsar is a really silly one. So my pieces of DVD were nothing more than coasters sitting in my folder.

Went to Singapore, get this portable DVD player. The Unique Selling Proposition of the salesman was "it can even play P****** discs!". I was sold, ha ha.

Now I've got this portable one which is like going to be the ultimate use anywhere.

Lo and behold, the player in my room in Amritsar, sensing the competition coming, is now able to play all my discs.

Strange.

Maybe they changed the hardware of the DVD when I was away ?

I'm an RNI, not an NRI

2007-04-19T14:32:00.000-07:00

You know, people who moved out to stay in Australia, US, UK etc are termed as NRI = Non Resident Indians. I mean these people are usually viewed by the people here as like "higher class" as, first of all, the earn more, and are like exposed to the world etc.

Even then ladies families look for grooms to marry their daughters to, NRIs are like preferred.

And when these NRIs come back to this place to visit their families etc, they are like a locally made product that's undergone some transformation, well, especially if you have a picture of yourself standing in front of the Statue of Liberty for example.

It was often even heard that dowry prices are increased 2-3 times when they see that the groom is taking a picture of some exotic location or beside a good car, like a Mercedes.

Well, that's the way it works here.

So the other day just to make a bo liao joke out of it, I was telling someone, ok, I'm not a NRI. Instead I am a RNI = Resident Non Indian.

HUH? Not very funny right ? Never mind, go and sleep liao, 3am here.

Raam Raam.

:: The indian head shake still baffles me ::

2007-04-18T01:26:00.000-07:00

Coming close to half a year as a RNI (as opposed to NRI, anyway more about that later), most o the time I have managed to conquer the problem of "not understanding whether that head shake is a yes or no" situation.

This morning however, was a disaster. At 11am (ok, maybe I woke up too early!), I walked into my favourite BAKES and BEANs cafe (which by the way is the only place in town that serves decent Italian and other eats like Greek Pasta, a decent Latte etc), yea so I walked in, everyone was like busy cutting vegetables, one was staring at the TV, one was sweeping the floor. I mean, they must know when someone walks in through the door right? For like 30seconds, I was trying to grab the attention of any of the nonchalant folks there, I'm quite bad at it I think.

When I finally got hold of the eye contact of one of them I ask him, "Are you open?, Can I get a Latte?", he gives me this 'actually I also don't know if we are open' look. Then he shakes he head. I ask again "I mean, are you open, can I get a Coffee, a Latte?", he shakes his head, blabbering something in Hindi (or Punjabi I don't know).

Actually I still did not get the answer I wanted. I asked for the third time. Then he motions to someone, apparently his superior, and they blabber among themselves like saying "hey theres' this irritating Chinese guy asking for a coffee when we are still cutting vegetables and watching TV, shall we entertain him?" kind of banter. The superior comes to me, shakes his head and then blabber in Hindi again.

ARRRRGH !!!

In the end I had to use sign language, showing "open" as in seperating my hands, or "closed" as in closing my hands to depict whether the store was open or closed.

Well, anyway to cut the long story short, I got my coffee, 36INR (about sgd1.20), decent Latte.

And guess what, outside the store, the sign read "Open 10am - 10pm"

!!!!!!

OK, here's 5 mangoes in exchange for 5 Harleys :::::

2007-04-17T01:16:00.000-07:00

So, it seems US is going to taste Indian Mangoes again after a 18 year ban, umm, interesting. In exchange for.... Harley. Way cool !

Check out this news article in ST.

Well, one thing I know for sure, if I can exchange 1 Harley for 1 mangoes, I've got 5 mangoes ready on hand anytime !

The new gourmet coffee joint in ATQ !!

2007-04-16T10:12:00.000-07:00

This is phenomenal. Now I don't have to contend with the "coffee" and the "ready made coffee" dilemma.

Good news is, 2 good "BARISTA" coffee joints just opened in the lazy city of Amritsar. One is on the way to work, one is a short 5 min detour away. But what the heck, at 45INR (sgd1.80) per latte / cuppacino etc, I'm not complaining.

Well, the standard is still sgd1.80 also though, not really the nice ones that you can find along any street in Melbourne, but well, give them some time to get it right. :oP

Can I have your "good" name please ?

2007-04-08T03:15:00.000-07:00

It's funny, again a figure of speech and culture, people here ask you "Can I have your good name please ?"

What the heck is a good name ?

I mean, typically we would say "How do I address you ?" or like "What is your name please ?" kinda thing.

But well, yeah, "Can I have your good name please ?"

The Vegetable trip

2007-03-05T05:28:00.000-08:00

Umm, for the first time in 4 mths, I actually went to buy vegetables in Amritsar.

Choices, well not much, was actually planning to get more leafy vegetables but all I could find was cabbage, Cauliflower, nothing like the "pang cai" we have in Sin City.

Anyways, Rebecca was with me, so we took a few pictures.

A nice Valentine's Day

2007-02-18T07:48:00.000-08:00

Nothing beats putting smiles on people's faces. This Valentine's Day I guess we must have done a couple of dozen or hundreds with the program we had at Amritsar - giving out roses to ladies.... err and to the occasional kid.

A smiling face makes the whole day's hard work worthwhile.

What do you call a small shopping mall ?

2007-02-15T19:06:00.000-08:00

No prize for guessing but you remember this old riddle asking "what do you call a small pig ?" "Piglet".

Ok, a small bull is not called a "bullet".

But yea, a small mall is called.........

Blue Turban, White Turban

2007-02-06T19:04:00.000-08:00

Sometime ago friends used to ask me, does the colour of a turban mean anything ? I actually went to ask. And no, it doesn't. Well, just that when the Sikhs attend like a formal dinner or something they don't wear bright pink of course, they just stick to the black and the dark blue.

Well, till today. The Punjab elections are going on. And it seems supporters of the Akali party don Blue & Safron colours and Supporters of the Ruling Congress Party don white turbans. Interesting eh. Good news for turban sellers.

Guess what colour Ah Long would wear ?

Charminar

2007-02-03T01:35:00.000-08:00

The beauty is in this place if you just stop and enjoy, truly.

Went over to Hyderabad a couple of weeks back and met a good mate there.

Charminar is a major landmark in Hyderabad and is 400 years old. Built by Mohammed Quli Qutub Shah in 1591, it was built to commerate the eradication of the plaque, shortly after he had shifted his capital from Golkonda to what now is known as Hyderabad.

Charminar is a squarish structure with four towers in the four corners of the square, each of whose sides is 20 metres in length. Every side opens into a plaza through giant arches, which overlook four major thoroughfares and dwarf other features of the building except the minarets. Each arch is 11 metres wide and rises 20 metres to the pinnacle from the plinth. The minarets soar skywards by 24 metres from the roof of Charminar. Each minaret has four storeys, each looking like a delicately carved ring around the minaret. Some Anglophiles call Charminar the Arc de Triomphe of the East. From the ground to the apex, the minarets cover a length of 48.7 metres.

Sunny side up fried or scrambled ?

2007-01-30T19:08:00.000-08:00

"Good morning, I'd like to have a continential breakfast"

"Eggs Sir ?"

"Yes, I'd like to have them sunny side up please."

"Sir, fried or scrambled ?"

"Sunny side up"

"Umm, is it fried or scrambled"

"ok, never mind"

30min vs 99 days

2007-01-28T19:56:00.000-08:00

It's not a secret that things are irritatingly inefficient in this land. What we are used to having in like the blink of a eye takes super long to happen in this land.

I was supposed to get this document which allows me to enter restricted premises in my work area. and well, i know there are certain rules to follow, certain clearances to do etc. I thought Aus was bad (err, okie they did have a clause that allowed me to get it straight away thanks) at 8 weeks but as the chinese saying goes, one mountain is always higher than the other.

What normally takes like a 30 min process took me 99 days. from 20Oct06 till 29Jan07. Within this period, of course I did my fair share of illegal things, sneaking into the area without a proper document but well, what should I do if my area of work is inside there ? So......

I'll tell my great grandson and granddaughter about this.

AC or Aircon

2007-01-27T19:35:00.000-08:00

Here in India people say "AC" ? "Eric, turn on the AC please ?"

Well, nothing big but as you know subconsciously we Singaporeans are used to calling it "Aircon". In India this is unheard of. Serious. You walk into an shop selling Air Conditioners, and say "I wish to buy an Air Con", they will say "What's that ?"

Well. Different nomenclature for same things.

7x10 or 10x7

2007-01-06T18:18:00.000-08:00

Once again let me start with a disclaimer, this post is not meant to make fun or discriminate but just to tell as a fact what happened.

---

Ok the other day I was going to conduct some training for a group of people, and so I was putting together this stack of training material. Came to around 7 pages. So well, next step was to make copies and prepare them for the training right ? So yea, I called my office boy, told him "Can you make 10 copies for me please?".

Off he went happy with the 7 sheets of papers stapled together, I suppose he took a stapler remover, removed them then started to photocopy them. And seriously, seriously, I was just expecting 70 sheets of paper to come back and I'll sort them out by myself.

Half and hour later after much toiling, he came back with the stack, neatly stapled and stacked on top of one another. And I was sincerely thinking "Wow, for once he exceeded my expectations, fabulous, I'm really surprised"

Well, not thinking too much about it, I placed the papers to one side and continued to do whatever I was doing, as the training was like 2 days away.

Lo and Behold, when it was time to give out the stacks of papers on the day of the training. You know what happened ? Yea you are right, b****y s*** 10 copies of 7 sheets stapled together nicely.

---

Well, I'm not trying to make fun or complain or whatsoever, but sometimes it just so funny. You know, things that we always take for granted and thought would be done nicely by default and have got used to in our lives, suddenly it comes back to surprise you and catch you at the last moment.

My life is getting more interesting. Sure to be more in 2007, ha ha.

The "queueing" industry

2007-01-05T18:08:00.000-08:00

Always seeking for opportunities, sometimes I salute these indians. But well, who can blame them, in a land where if you do not step up and fight for yourself and earn your next meal, who will do it for you ?

---

The other day at Delhi (DEL), I was a New Delhi Railway station and thanks to the flight coming in late, I missed my reserved seating train from DEL to Agra (Land of the Taj Mahal). So, well, my 300INR just flew like that. So well, next was to find a train to get from DEL to Agra again. Went to the New Delhi railway station, saw the HUMONGOUS (did I spell this correctly?) queue there in the booking queue. Amidst figuring out whether this was the place where we should be buying our tickets and trying to hear an offer from an indian man who just turned up beside us offering a "package" of going by car instead.

So yea, after a while we decided to take a walk around. Then we saw this "reservations for foreign tourists" - wah not bad, I think they must know that we stupid tourists will be kanna chopped by the illegal service providers around, so they set up this counter for us. Went in to the place, nicely done up, train schedules and all, saw the train we want to take, then there was this "chair queuing system" and one caucasian woman told me, albeit rudely as I was about to sit down "Actually the queue starts from there" (point to a place about 20m away).

Ok, there's no way we were going to catch a train leaving in 20min time if we were to join the queue (err, more about the punctuality of trains later!) so we decided to leave the "foreigner booking office".

Went downstairs, saw this "unreserved seating counter", as usual was packed with lots of people trying to get a ticket. Was also in the midst of wondering, d*** have to endure like close to an hour of queueing again ! Then this man comes up, says, "ok, I'll you tickets, it's normally 65INR per person but I'll charge you INR200 for 2 persons"

I said "OK!" (INR200 is only SGD8 just by the way)

He takes our money, jumps across all the queues, goes up the counter, hands over a portion (he and the ticket counter staff have a deal going on I'm sure) and comes by in 49 seconds flat with tickets !

Amazing !

---

Money works. It works better in India.

Internet down for 8 days !

2006-12-23T09:42:00.000-08:00

Since 9pm Local Time on 15Dec06, the internet in my hotel room has been down..... and OMG today is already 23Dec and 8 days without a proper internet connection is just.......... killing. There are services available but you know just not shiok 'cos it's not using my own laptop and not in the comfort of my room.............

Well hopefully it will be up soon......

Am now sitting in the lobby of another hotel using the wireless internet here....... :oP

Strikes across India

2006-12-14T19:45:00.000-08:00

Yeah, no need to work liao. Strike loh !

Yesterday say many parts of India having strikes, basically to protest against privatisation plans and to demand new labour laws.

Well I don't blame them, they are fighting for their own rights. They are campaigning against privatisation of state run companies and the move to allow foreign investment in banks. Well for a country to move forward this has to happen right ? Open up and all. Globalisation and all. But of course this leads to job losses in many areas, so well no one is happy to lose his/her job.

Was driving back from buying fireworks (now this is a totally different blog entry altogether) with my mates yesterday when we were held up in super duper heavy traffic across the bridge over the railway line (err, okay that's the only way I know to return home, if they ask me to go by another way, I wouldn't know too, ha ha) and ha ha, I got my camera with me. Not very prominent pics amidst the crowds but you get the idea lah.

Spot the opportunistic photographers on the rooftop ? D**m should have brought my 350D with me.

Err, maybe our Mr C*** S*** J*** should come here for some training ?

Did you p*y the postman ?

2006-12-13T17:19:00.000-08:00

The other day I was asking one of my colleagues of this perennial problem that I have, to have my mail sent from Singapore and to find, I mean to discover that some of them were missing, whether in whole or in portions. It's amazing man, some of my mail I know I would get did not come, some came within 10 days of posting from SIN, some a whole month later, another one came with the papers but not the significant contents which included a self inking stamp, d**m it. This is a harrowing experience, to have no stability even over the postage system !!

So yea I consulted my collegue how did he manage this ? Without a second thought, he just said "Did you p*y the postman ?"

Coming from a place like Singapore, seriously the one biggest thing I hate about this place is the c********n. Simple things like that also need to go "settle" yourself. Ok maybe I am pampered by Singapore's clean efficient system I admit.

Ok.................. better go and check how many rupees I have left to p*y to facilitate my mail to prevent my next Apprentice DVD coming in from ending up in some postman's son's house.

A can of cock please........

2006-12-12T09:57:00.000-08:00

Ok I know this is crude........ but in part 3 of the series of inflight misuse of English (and the final instalment) I have to cover this !

------

Cabin Crew asks passenger "Sir what would you like to drink please ?"

Passenger "Yes can I have a can of cock please ?"

Cabin Crew "Sir you mean a can of coke ?" while trying to suppress her laughter.

------

The above 3 stories / jokes are not meant to cause malice nor against any particular religion, race or nationality and is meant to cause no harm. The airline mentioned is not implied... but.... aiyah, what the heck ? Those who know me know what airline I am talking about. Kan na sai.

I still have a carton of cock in my fridge though.

A wonderful birthday with lots of blessings

2006-12-12T04:56:00.000-08:00

2831miles from Singapore but plenty of well wishes coming in thru msn, email, sms.

Thanks my friends.

I set up an "honour" list to those who remembered my birthday today 12 Dec 06. From Singapore unless otherwise stated.

1. Dad
2. Mum
3. my Bloodter (somewhere on the causeway)
4. my cousin Huilin
5. my auntie Adeline
6. Eugenia (Melbourne)
7. Yen Ping, Tan
8. Jacintha
9. Ying Huei
10. Hoong Goon
11. Yen Peng, Ang
12. Roger Koh
13. Wee Meng
14. Daryl
15. Sam
16. Yin Kiat
17. Limin
18. Ester
19. Wilson (London)
20. Elizabeth (Melbourne)
21. Shannon (Shanghai)
22. Larry
23. Lin Nah
24. Shawn (Brunei)
25. Justin
26. Anthony Khalsa (Amritsar)
27. Lakhanpal (Amritsar)
28. Varun (Amritsar)
29. Tushar (Amritsar)
30. Rishi (Amritsar)
31. Hardeep (Amritsar)
32. Vimal (Amritsar)
33. Rashmi (Amritsar)
34. Sunita (Amritsar)
35. Vikram (Amritsar)
36. Rajiv (Amritsar)
37. Shirlynn
38. Lawrence (US)
39. Linus
40. Cassandra (Brisbane)
41. YiHui
42. Maurice
43. Melvin
44. Richard
45. Ajit Mehra (Amritsar)
46. Linda
47. Emily
48. Murad (Uzbekistan)
49. Salil (Amsitsar)
50. Phobe (New Zealand)
51. Emily
52. Jamie (Mauritius)
53. ..........................

Sex after take off ?

2006-12-11T21:34:00.000-08:00

"Sir would you like to have some drinks after take off ?" asked the cabin crew.

"Oh it's ok" the wife beside the man abruptly cut into the conversation between the cabin crew and the male passenger. "After drinks we've have some sex"

As the neurons raced in the cabin crew's mind as to what the heck she meant, she quickly corrected "oh sorry I meant after take off we'd like to have some snacks"

WAH HA HA !

PS : look at my pose (I mean post) on the earlier day to understand that we are in the topic of misconjured English.

"I am chicken, she is maaaaaaa"

2006-12-10T18:49:00.000-08:00

"Sir and Mdm, which lunch set would you like to have?"

"I am Chicken, she is errr, maaaaaaaaaaa"

Once again, the different use of the English language conjures up opportunities for laughter. This was a conversation overheard between the cabin crew and two Indian passengers male and female. ok, first better have a disclaimer, I don't claim to have the best English language use or want to criticise anything but just sharing this experience for laughter's sake, story ends here.

So yea, our 2 dear friends are clearly challenged in the English department, and it was really quite funny for someone to say "I am chicken, she is" and I think "lamb" was not in his dictionary yet, so........... affectionately he imitated the lamb sound.

I mean...... this is so cute. ha ha.

More fun incidents coming your way, stay tuned. :o)

PS : ok, now someone criticise my Hindi please. Ek Toe Tin Char Punch Chay Sat Art No Desk ?

The foggy morning

2006-12-07T09:26:00.000-08:00

ON Wed morning just before I left Amritsar for Singapore...... seriously I got a shock when I opened my door in the morning at 730am.

I mean, I was expecting fog at this time of the year, and people have been telling me the fog can be so bad that you can't see the vehicle in front of you, and in times can't see the person standing in front of you (leaves me to wonder "really"?)

But yes, it was still a shock to see that, I mean to realise that I can't see the normally 2 "malls" opposite the hotel where I stay. It was just .......... fog.

Now this is going to be perennial problem for me for the next 2 mths !

That's the carpark shrouded with the misty stuff.

And I was to realise that this thingy didn't clear till around 2pm everyday, when the sun came out strongly. Then when the sun sets at around 5pm, wah lah. Till next morning.

Anyone got an Infra Red goggles to spare ? MINDEF ? I need it for driving man.

I am Home !

2006-12-06T11:31:00.000-08:00

ok, to write a post about not being India in an Indian blog, funny right.

But yea, 5 and half hours at 35000ft, about 4500km, enduring the searing humidity once again..... I am home. In Singapore, finally, ooh I see aerobridges, no power outages, good taxis, lifts.....

Short stay though, 4 days, in fact less than that, literally 82 hours and then back to lovely India.

Just enuf time to finish 1 x Char Kway Teow, 1 x Hokkien Mee, 1 x Kway Chap, 1 x Mee Goreng ....

Stay tuned.

Kulcha Land

2006-12-04T23:16:00.000-08:00

This must be one of the food which is specific to Amritsar - Kulcha. You know what is "naan" right ? Kulcha is like naan but stuffed with fillings like potato etc. Makes it super delicious and certainly one of my favourite authentic Amritsari dishes.

Never seen in Singapore though, or should I be walking about more in little India ?

There's a nice quaint little store near the city office called "Kulcha-Land" woo. If you think along the likes of "Disneyland" then I'm quite sure you are waaaaaaaaaay off, but yeah the Kulcha there is nonetheless nice, only about INR15 each (in sharp contrast to the INR25 at the hotel).

Kulcha !

How do I put this into words ?

2006-11-28T08:09:00.000-08:00

Err, dunno how to describe, but this is an actual photo taken of a new road here in the town Jalandhar.

End of story.

The Airport at Amritsar

2006-11-26T06:01:00.000-08:00

Fresh from the airport, I have uploaded some photos of Amritsar Airport on my photos site.

Dhoom 2 - my first Hindi Movie experience

2006-11-25T08:47:00.000-08:00

2 hours ago i was still sitting in the cinema of a hindi movie - "Dhoom 2" - staring Hrithik Rishan, Aishwarya Rai, Abhishek Bachchan, Uday Chopra, Bipasha Basu and Rimi Sen. See the links here and here. Talk more about the plot and the movie later but more of the movie experience first.

Ok, I mean, I have passed by the movie complex a couple of times and I've lived here for a while so well, my expectations are managed. So, when my friend the owner of the hotel coyly asked me "Neil, want to see a Hindi movie", I stopped in my tracks and then said "why not ?" "Ok, you go get changed, we leave in 5 minutes." Well, I was running off to get changed but then asked him "err, are the English subtitles ?". "No, not really but you'll enjoy it anyway" "Ok, I trust you !"

Seriously it was not as bad as I expected it to be, sure it's a little stuffy and the seats were like springy and all, and we were really lucky that my friend actually knew the owner of the cinema and she arranged special seats for us, because you know why, as we are already seated there in the hall and thinking "Umm, not bad eh, not many people today" suddenly the door was opened and the whole place just changed mood, hordes, and I mean, hordes of indians poured into the cinema, grabbing seats as fast as they can. Err, yes every person is suppoed to be assigned to a seat but err, well, doesn't happen.

We spent the next 5-10 minutes as people were pushing and shovelling and quarrelling about the seats. I was really wondering when this would end, but as if he read my mind, my friend turned around to me and said "Don't worry, when the show starts they will grab seats and seat down like as if they were playing musical chairs !" TRUE ENOUGH !!! 5 seconds. All were seated.

Movie started. Male lead appears, whistle and cheers. Male actor jumps of helicopter with parachute, whistles and cheers. Male actor lands on moving train and strikes a pose. Whistle and cheers. Aiyah you get the idea, it was like "interactive cinema" man !! Of course when Aiswarya Rai appeared the indian men went crazy......... well I must admit she's damn chio too.

So much for that...... I survived and thoroughly enjoyed my first Hindi movie in India, seriously. Will be looking for more to watch............

Chilly Chilly Cold Cold

2006-11-24T21:31:00.000-08:00

It IS getting colder by the day here in Amritsar, North India. Over the past few nights we had a couple of rainy overnights and then well, I guess it was about 12 degrees at night if you are just standing outside. The weather reports show mostly 22-23s for the days and 8-12s for the nights in the coming 5 days. I meant degrees C there of course.

Well, time to put my gear into good use yesterday night I was really really glad I did not scrimp on the thermal and winter wear during the post winter sale in Aus. Now if I really freeze to my bones here I have only myself to blame for just being lazy not to just wear it.

In between the last paragraph and this, I went to my MSN and typed "Damnit, 2nd Winter this year" but then decided to change to "Yeah, 2nd winter this year".......... well, I do like the cold better than the hot, though of course on SOME days you really really really wish you don't have to keep wearing the bulky stuff etc.

Well, this weather is understandable, given that areas up north have started snowing, Himachal Pradesh and all.........

Grrrrrrr..........

Was that Dengue ?

2006-11-23T04:20:00.000-08:00

Suffered greatly over the past 4 days with severe headache, diarrheoa, nausea, body aches..... was supposed to be on a biz trip but came back early to recuperate, else I think it wouldn't be productive anyway...............

Saw the doc............ nope, he never did mention those words.......... it was not dengue fever as I feared it to be, just a stomach infection which caused those agony........... advised me to be careful about what I eat............ ok.

Well, it's part and parcel of the travel experience isn't it......... even the diarrheoa is a must have experience else how to tell people I stayed in India ? Ha Ha.......... but err........ not another time please............ not in a million years...........

Why not contribute to Mother Theresa's Home in India ?

2006-11-18T03:32:00.000-08:00

Hi Friends,

If you have old clothes or shoes or whatsoever for children aged between 02-10 years old, why not donate it to me so I can bring it to India for you. I'll help you make a difference to this orphanage in Amritsar - the Mother Theresa's Home.

SUN last I had an opportunity to visit this Orphanage at this city where I'm living now and ....... it was quite nice.

Those were the active kids coming out to pose for the photo. <<<

Aged between 2-8 these were the active bunch and were jumping around, playing around all the time.We spent a good time taking photos and boy, were they intrigued by the camera, after every shot, everyone rushed to the camera and wanted a glimpse of the display on the LCD screen, ha ha. They were like, "hey, take me, take me" as in prompting us to take a picture for them and then show them how they look in the picture. You know, it's like such a simple thing and it gives them great joy.

Ok, I must admit that the children are very well taken care of, thanks to the 6 kind sisters who work there day and night to ensure the well being of these 25 children. But then they still have pretty bad living conditions and will always need support from us.

Many of these children are simply left outside the orphanage or by the roadside because of the poverty here. The sisters were telling me, sometimes they open the gate in the morning, they find a baby outside the gate with a note. Ok, I don't know if the families practice birth control but apparently they do not have the means to bring up addition children in their family and so......... the simple way out...... give them away.

My point is..... these children are innocent and should not be suffering because of the decisions that their parents made....... so besides living on the donations of money and clothes/shoes etc. they are having the opportunity to go to school etc and that's great.

So............ if you have old clothes, shoes etc which are lying around anyway and sellling them to karang guni will only give you like SGD2, why not pass them to me so I can help you bring them here ? Contact me for more information, I'll be back in Singapore in December.

Namaste.

Everything can be done in India.........

2006-11-17T23:12:00.000-08:00

ok, I admit it....... i was visibly shocked when my colleague put a metal tin can into the microwave oven and was going to turn it on with the chapati and the daal and the green beans in it. I shouted "wait, you sure that the thing will not explode ?" I mean, all my life I have stuck on to the belief that you should never ever put anything metallic into a microwave and then turn it on, cos sparks will fly and then the whole thing might explode. Right ? Wrong !

"Everything can be done in India" was the reply I got from them. Everything you believe to be true "doesn't apply in India". Ha ha. That was a big paradigm shift really. I mean, apart from the very fact that the crockery really managed to uneventfully heat up in the microwave, it was really as I mentioned, that a "rule" I took for granted all my life was simply just "broken" like that.

Ok...........let me get the fire extinguisher and try it for myself at home.

Pinglish

2006-11-16T22:06:00.000-08:00

Of course we are very familiar with the term Singlish in Singapore, where the "la"s and the "lor"s come into play in our daily conversation and also our horrible sentence structure like "you got go to market ?" instead of "did you go to the market?". Well, surprise surprise, here in Punjab, there is also the Punjabi slang of English affectionately called Pinglish - Punjabi English. Ok, I won't be able to share with you the most advanced Pinglish we have here 'cos I'm not an expert at Punjabi yet, but here's an idea.

The use of the word "only" seems to intrigue me these days. Eg. in a restaurant setting, you and your friend are sitting and waiting for another friend to come along. Typically your friend would say "I'm just waiting for my friend to come", here they say "I'm waiting for my friend to come only". Well nothing wrong grammatically but it just sounds funny. And it happens everytime. Instead of saying "I'm just going to the toilet" which implies that your visit to the toilet will be quick, here we say "I'm going to the toilet only" which is like more saying "trust me, I'm really going to the toilet and will not go anywhere", well, if I must say it, it's like your kid telling you this to like earn your trust.

I think there are also Chingish, Inglish, Vinglish......... right ?

Ok, I am going to the toilet only.

Later.

Kidnapping, a high profit industry

2006-11-15T23:51:00.000-08:00

This country is amazing, apparently there is a "kidnapping industry" going on here ! On this Monday just past, the three year old son of Adobe India CEO was kidnapped while he was waiting outside his house on the way to school with the maid. Obviously until today he has not been found but the police say they are "very close" to finding him.....

No further comments......

There's this article on IBNLIVE (Indian version of CNN) on this topic if you are interested in further reading.

AMAZING.

"UPS" - okay I'm not referring to the courier company

2006-11-11T10:23:00.000-08:00

I'm referring to this, UPS - Uninterruptable Power Supply.

Common to enterprise hardware like banks, servers etc. But not quite that common in the Singapore household 'cos well, I've never really experienced a blackout in Singapore before except for the time I was living in a kampong.

In India, if I get by a day w/o a power blackout, it's my lucky day...... in fact I'm crossing my fingers that as I'm typing this the power doesn't play me out cos... err I'm still charging the unit and not put it into use yet.

Apparently the power grid system can't support the power use throughout Amritsar. So, when say one section of Amritsar consumes too much power, like everyone turns on their washing machine at the same time... ok, sorry I forgot that not everyone owns a washing machine here. Ok, say everyone turns on their lights at the same time or...... aiyah you get the idea, the power station like turns off the power to certain areas in order to provide that power. Makes sense right ? It's like if you got a pipe flowing at 100litres/minute, there's only so many taps you can support. So.... well.... life goes on.... now without any interruption of the power for me from today onwards !

33 thousand Sir............

2006-11-10T22:58:00.000-08:00

.......ok, my mind goes to work at my 27 times table again, I silently mumble 33 thousand divide by 25 (for convenience's sake) equals..... err ok, 25000 rupees make 1000 sing dollars. so 32500 rupees will make 1300 sing dollars, ok around there...... wah ! expensive man.....

Of course the item in question was a 20" LCD screen TV that I was eyeing to connect up my puny thinkpad screen so I do view everything at one go.... talk about typical Singaporean kiasu-ism right ?

My third completed week in Amritsar India and life is really getting good man...... starting to love this place and seriously I think the beauty and charm of this place exudes itself after some time. Nothing like the hustle and bustle of Singapore, high stress environment where everything moves faster than you. Ok, let me correct that, on Mon, Tue, Thu and Sat my life is more relaxed cos I'm not working on those days....... envy right ?

This part of India is particularly not developed yet, being up north near to the Pakistan border and not the main centre of economic activity. However there ARE changes coming up in the coming years with major hotel chains coming in and setting up shop here.

Cee Tee Mall <<, just opp where I currently live, this is one of the most developed malls here. With Nike to boot ok ! Not bad eh ?

Visitors welcome. Jet Airways, Air India, Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, Transaero, Singapore Airlines flies here from various destinations......... just bring sgd500 will last you a whole week (including accomodation ! )